Cheating

When I was 15 years old I broke my knee in gym class jumping hurdles. I had surgery and to this day have two big screws in my knee. My doctor told me that I am not allowed to run ever again... well in this lifetime anyway. I was not hurt by this pronouncement however. Running for exercise was first introduced to me by a She-Devil named Ms. Alvarez. She made running hell on earth and I loathed running almost as much as I loathed her. In fact, it was kind of a relief. My high school gym classes consisted of me walking around the track while everyone else passed me by. Which is how it always was, but at least everyone knew I had an excuse this time.

There have been a few times since the broken knee incident that I have cheated and gone running. These instances usually happen when I am feeling really stressed or have high anxiety levels. The last time I cheated was about four years ago. Well, for some reason this week I have felt the strongest urge to cheat again. And I did.... twice. As I am running the streets of Logan, ipod on, out of breath (cause I haven't gone running in 4 years) I feel SOOOO good! I feel like I am gonna freakin' die, but somehow at the same time it feels SOOOOO good!!!! Maybe this whole "not allowed to run" thing is not such a good thing after all. Running is addicting. But somehow I need to stop this addiction because if I don't my knee is gonna swell like the stinkin' Goodyear Blimp!